Chrissy Metz Reflects On Childhood Trauma And Abuse At The Hands Of Her Stepfather

Chrissy Metz isn’t holding back with regard to “mental, physical, emotional abuse” she received at the hands of her stepfather, who she believes singled her out from her four siblings because of her weight.

Appearing on Tuesday’s episode of “The Jamie Kern Lima Show,” Metz said she felt as though she was living under “a magnifying glass” around her stepfather, noting: “He would weigh me in the kitchen or threaten to lock the cupboards.”

“It still affects the way I walk into a room. It’s my desire to be a people pleaser and a peacemaker,” the “This Is Us” actor recalled. “Why does my weight equate my worthiness? Or why does it bother him so much? Or what is he projecting onto me? What is that? And as a 12-year-old kid, it’s like, how do you reconcile that in your mind?”

Since then, Metz has worked through some of her trauma in therapy, which has enabled her to forgive her mother, who she says “was struggling for many, many years,” and has given her a more empathetic outlook on her stepfather’s actions.

“Now as an adult, I’m like, OK, maybe he actually loved me, didn’t know how to express it, and did it in such a difficult way that he thought he was being helpful,” she said. “He doesn’t want me to be unhealthy. He doesn’t want me to be a certain way. But also hurt people hurt people. And he was, I think, very hurt by his own father.”

Actor Chrissy Metz first opened up about her turbulent childhood in her 2018 memoir, "This Is Me: Loving the Person You Are Today."

Paul Archuleta via Getty Images

A Florida native, Metz first addressed her turbulent childhood in her 2018 memoir, “This Is Me: Loving the Person You Are Today.” In it, she wrote how her stepfather ― whom she identified only as Trigger ― “shoved me, slapped me, punched my arm” over the years.

“He sat in a chair next to the scale as I got on [the scale]. ‘Good God almighty!’ he yelled every single time,” she wrote, according to an excerpt of the book published by People. “The number then was about 140 or 130. Most of my friends weighed about ninety pounds.”

“I look at pictures of me from that time, and I would be so fine with being that size now,” she continued. “But I thought I was gigantic. By then the beating had escalated. One time he hit me, and I looked right in his face. If I had a gun, I thought, I would shoot you.”

In her “Jamie Kern Lima Show” chat, Metz also recalled the challenges she faced in auditions for Hollywood projects as an actor with a larger body. She noted that she was “so indebted” to “This Is Us” creator Dan Fogelman for casting her as Kate Pearson on the NBC series, which also starred Mandy Moore and Milo Ventimiglia.

“I always say, if I never book another role or show or a movie again, it’s enough,” she said. “It set the tone for new shows and new movies, and just people being cast as just people, even if they weren’t a particular size, and even the role didn’t have to talk about the size that they were. That position that I got to just so gratefully be put in was so special ... to feel chosen, that I was good enough, that I was the right person.”

“It provided an opportunity to instill trust in myself,” she added.

Watch Chrissy Metz’s “Jamie Kern Lima Show” chat below.