I’m tired of walking home with my keys between my fingers — it’s time women’s safety was seen as a shared responsibility

We’re all responsible for protecting women in public spaces

As a woman, I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve raced home, keys pressed between my fingers, my other hand poised to hit ‘call’ having pre-dialled 999 or my boyfriend. I’m not alone and I’m not irrational for fearing my safety so acutely, especially once the clocks go back and the window of light narrows.

According to the latest Femicide Census, a woman is killed by a man every 2.7 days. Just last week, a woman was raped in a children’s playground after being approached by four men. Gender-based violence is an epidemic and women are rightfully concerned.

According to crime statistics from the Office for National Statistics, people feel less safe walking alone after dark than during the day; with women feeling less safe than men in all settings after dark. In every section, women reported feeling more unsafe than men and women aged 16 to 34 years felt the most unsafe of any age and sex group using public transport alone after dark.

A new campaign by UN Women UK asks, “How safe did you feel the last time you walked home?” Almost all of us know the feeling of walking home with our keys clamped between our fingers nervously glancing behind to see if anyone is following while simultaneously trying to look like we’re not nervous.

For many of us, this gnawing anxiety is about to get worse now that we have lost the added protection of daylight. It’s why UN Women UK has launched the Right to Move campaign which calls on the public to call out harassment when they see it.

“We know that when women don’t feel safe, their movements are restricted” explains Tabitha Morton, UN Women UK Executive Director, adding; “With shorter days and longer nights, women are forced to take extra protection measures to stay safe when moving through public spaces. But it shouldn’t have to be that way.”

Morton’s comments reminded me of that viral video “What would you do if all men disappeared for 24 hours?” Most of the answers weren’t grandiose, they didn’t involve elaborate plans or breaking into national landmarks. Instead, they overwhelmingly revealed how deeply and depressingly unsafe most women feel. “go on a night out and not have to worry about watching my drink every second” read one comment, another; “imagine being able to wear both airpods”.

Everyone should be able to walk home safely without the need for makeshift weapons or only listening to music in one ear, the other attuned to potential danger. Yet, at a time when sexist crimes are on the rise with a 37% increase in gender-based violence and falling prosecution rates to boot, walking home without some kind of escape plan or precaution doesn’t just feel naive, it feels almost dangerous.

Of course, it shouldn’t and even when we follow all the supposed ‘guidance’ and safety best practices, we can still run into trouble. We shouldn’t be encouraging women to enrol in self-defence classes and carry pepper spray and rape alarms, we should be teaching young men and boys to not hurt women. And—as the Right to Move campaign aims—we should be looking out for one another and calling out harassment when we see it.

According to a 2021 UN Women report, over 70% of women in the UK say they’ve experienced sexual harassment in public. “This campaign is an invitation to people of all genders to support women’s Right to Move”, explains Morton.

Separated into three action points—Stop, Support, Report—Right to Move asks the public to share the responsibility of protecting and looking out for each other. It’s something I’ve seen women do, but rarely have I witnessed a man step up for a woman he doesn’t already know. I don’t think this comes from a lack of interest, I just suspect that as women, we are more attuned to danger.

Saoirse Ronan summed this up perfectly in another clip that has been doing the rounds on social media. Appearing on The Graham Norton Show this weekend, Ronan silenced her male co-guests, Paul Mescal and Eddie Redmayne, with a reminder of the mental load of violence against women and girls. Discussing the prep for his new film, Redmayne explained he’d been learning self-defence from a specialist combat expert who instructed him to use his mobile as a weapon. Mescal piped in to say he’d never think to get his phone out if he was about to be attacked, asking, “Who is actually going to think about that?” to which Ronan replied, “That’s what girls have to think about all the time”, before adding “Am I right, ladies?”

Activist and founder of the feminist platform @cheeruplove, Eliza Hatch, perhaps put this best when she said, “I think this clip is a really good example of how you can have a room full of the most progressive, least problematic, least toxic, total “nice guy” men - and the lived experience of half the population is still the furthest thing from their minds. And is something the only woman in the room needs to remind them of.”

It’s just one of many reasons why I’ll be sharing the below outline from UN Women UK with all the men in my life.

How to help keep women safe in public spaces

1. Stop and offer your help (focus on the person, not the perpetrator)
2. Support the person to safety (check what would make them feel safe, walk them to the bus/train, call a taxi, wait with them until a friend arrives)
3. Report it only if they want to (this could be by calling 999, Text British Transport Police on 61016 or to the security or management team of the event or space)