Heather Gordon, 54, and her husband, James, have found that maintaining separate residences works wonders for their relationship.
Challenging conventional norms, the couple, both in their second marriage, have embraced the concept of "Living Apart Together" (LAT). Their unique arrangement, shared to TikTok on December 1, has sparked discussion and captured the curiosity of many.
Speaking with Newsweek, Gordon detailed the logistics and benefits of their unconventional setup, which includes improving their sleep and maintaining individual workspaces for their respective businesses.
"We are a second marriage, and when we met in 2020, our commitment to each other took off faster than our circumstances could accommodate," Gordon told Newsweek.
Both were still raising children from previous marriages, with three in high school and one in college. The couple decided that maintaining separate households was the best option to allow their children stability while nurturing their own budding relationship.
James rented an apartment just 1.5 miles from Gordon's house, allowing him to be close while providing space for his children when they visited.
"We both have demanding work lives—James has one business, and I have two—so having separate spaces where we can work from home effectively was crucial," Gordon said. "I also see clients from home, so it would have been too chaotic under one roof."
Their routine includes daily visits and a strong emotional connection despite the physical separation and the designing and occupying different homes.
"We do not have an open marriage, and we see each other daily. It is interesting how so many people said, 'Why get married then?' As if your home address makes the marriage," she said.
Gordon's journey into social media began when she launched her beauty brand, Project Goods. "I started using TikTok on November 5 to create brand awareness for my new fragrance-free product line," she said.
Despite her unfamiliarity with the platform, Gordon's content quickly gained traction. She then decided to share a short clip on December 1 that broke down how LAT has been working well for her and her husband.
She told viewers, "My husband and I have separate places, I think there's a term for it, called LAT, Living Apart Together." In the caption, she added, "Part 2: Living Apart Together (LAT) works so well for us. It's a second marriage, it's best for our kids right now, we sleep so much better and our intimacy is better. We love it!"
The concept of LAT challenges traditional views of marriage, which often emphasize shared living spaces as a cornerstone of marital stability. However, Gordon's experience suggests that separate residences can enhance rather than detract from marital satisfaction.
"We love sleeping apart because we just sleep better," she said. "When we are total empty nesters, we will live together again.
"We are building our dream home with two primary suites!"
The response from viewers online has been divided, with many showing praise for the couple's approach while others opened up about how it is not for them.
"Living apart together will be the new normal...As it should be," one viewer said.
"Not for me, I want to be around my husband ALL of the time. I can't sleep without him," a commenter wrote.
"This is perfect along with keeping finances separate and all house work," a third viewer said. "Then the relationship is only about the relationship not service."
Despite the mixed response, the couple believes their story is not just about practical logistics but also about redefining what a successful marriage looks like.
English (US) ·