Strictly's Anita Rani reveals 'cripplingly sad' Christmas which completely changed her life

TV favourite Anita Rani says she looks at life differently after experiencing anxiety and a panic attack following a 'Christmas like no other'

TV presenter Anita Rani has spoken about her 'cripplingly sad' Christmas that led to her suffering anxiety and a scary panic attack.

The 47-year-old, who regularly hosts Countryfile and Radio 4's Woman's Hour, revealed how she had a miscarriage in 2018 while still in a relationship with husband of 14 years Bhupi Rehal, who she announced she had split from in September 2023.

But instead of slowing down and trying to deal with what had happened, Anita said she continued to live at 100mph as she had done for as long as she could remember. It was only when Christmas hit - the only time of year she gets two weeks off work - that her loss finally began to sink in.

Describing it as "a Christmas like no other", the telly star - who appeared on Strictly Come Dancing in 2015 - said it ended up completely shifting her perspective on life and how she was living it.

Writing about her experience in Red magazine, Anita shared: "I was working at my usual crazy pace, except I was also having a miscarriage. I was filming War On Plastics and Countryfile around the country, hosting events and preparing for the Strictly Christmas special, while my body was going through something very real. It was an incredibly sad time for me and my husband, but because there was so much going on with at work, I didn't slow down, and decided to process it properly at Christmas instead. The truth is, I didn't process it over Christmas."

Antia told how she ignored it, "dusted it off and emerged back as my old self". But something didn't feel right. After hitting the pub - which she doesn't advise anyone to do - she occupied her time with doing stuff. One such thing was climbing Kilimanjaro for Comic Relief. But halfway up she suffered a full on panic attack.

Concerned for her health, Anita convinced herself she had an illness. And while she had lots of blood and medical tests, doctors couldn't find anything wrong with her. She confessed: "All year I felt anxiety and insecurity like never before. What made those feelings worse was the terror or not knowing or understanding what I was going through. I didn't recognise myself." Reflecting on the experience, she said: "It's only now, after a year of reflection and paying attention, that I fully understand what the problem was: I was sad. Deeply, truly and cripplingly sad."

Opening up to the Mirror in an exclusive chat now she's out the other side, Anita says she is now in her 'empowerment' era. She told us: "Life is good. I’m in a good place, I’m focusing on myself and my own wants. It’s nice to be able to think about the second phase of my life. I’ve been calling it Chapter Two."

And Christmas 2024 is looking very different for Anita too. She has bagged herself a brand new festive TV show - documentary series, My Life At Christmas, which will be shown on the BBC. This year's celebrity guests include the likes of acting icon Dame Sheila Hancock, EastEnders legend Rudolph Walker and former TOWIE star turned entrepreneur Spencer Matthews to find out what Christmas means to them.

If you have been affected by this story, advice and support can be found at the Miscarriage Association. You can call them on 01924 200799 or email info@miscarriageassociation.org.uk

Do you have a story to share? Email me at katie.wilson01@reachplc.com

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