The Traitors US 3’s first murder and that ‘Trinity of Terror’ twist

I began the second episode of The Traitors US season three with my eyes rolled back in my head at the Big Brother-style twist the producers planned: bringing in three more men—Survivor large wooden head Rob Mariano, Big Brother’s Derrick Levasseur, and The Challenge’s Wes Bergmann—all three winners of their respective shows, and making one a traitor.

Why have a game on an even playing field when you can pile nonsense onto the scale? See, I’m so distressed I’m mixing metaphors.

I haven’t yet seen The Traitors UK season three, but I’d be surprised if it did something like this. My guess is this is typical American reality TV overproducing, not trusting the cast and format enough to leave it alone to unfold organically.

There are some big personalities with excellent track records already in the castle—Tony, Jeremy, Danielle, Carolyn, Britney—but bringing these three in on day two, and giving them immunity from both the roundtable and the first murder is just stupid. Not as stupid as bringing Kate in more than halfway through a season, but still stupid.

I’m mostly disappointed because the dynamic of Danielle, Carolyn, and Bob is great, and I don’t need Rob in the turret pretending he’s running the game.

Of course, Rob’s return was obvious from the second Alan Cumming said “exile,” not “airplane home,” especially since Rob was announced as part of the cast. Handing him immunity and the power of the traitors, though, ugh.

If this was Big Brother, this is the moment in the season when I’d turn off the show and just read Hamsterwatch’s recaps. But The Traitors has amassed enough goodwill, and this cast is so great otherwise, that of course I am not doing that. Also if I did that I couldn’t complain!

And I’ll grudgingly admit that some fun TV came of it.

From suspended cages, the three players revealed themselves to each other, and immediatly Derrick threw some shade to Wes: “You’re retired. I thought you were done.” Wes said, “with The Challenge.” Later, Derrick said Danielle is “the best Big Brother player to never win,” and with that kind of respect for a fellow BB hamster, I’m curious to see how they play together, especially with Danielle’s traitor role.

Rob said, “I don’t think anybody’s going to be happy,” and there’s something I agree with him about. But they stayed there in the woods all night, just like Rob and Sandra stayed on that island all during Survivor: Island of the Idols, wink-wink.

The Traitors US season 3 episode 2 introduced new players: Derrick Levasseur, Wes Bergmann, and Rob Mariano (Photo by Euan Cherry/Peacock)

Back at the castle, the traitors met to discuss their first murder. They did not agree about much, though eventually settled on Real Housewives stars, and specifically Delores, Dorinda, or Robyn. Carolyn wanted to keep Dorinda as a shield, but did not get her way.

The traitors all ended up sitting together at breakfast, which was weird and I guess also not suspicious? Bob, who was wearing another outfit to rival Alan’s looks, told us, “I am shitting my pants about this breakfast.”

But it was Tom Sandoval who seemed most nervous, having lost what looked like several swimming pools worth of sweat through his armpits. Was he thinking Ariana was knocking on the door?

When it was clear Dorinda was on her way back to Blue Stone Manor, I wanted to yell one of Dorinda’s lines at the traitors: “If no one can behave themselves, then you all go home!”

I’m just sad to lose Dorinda this early, but I understand the choice from a strategic point of view. Bob the Drag Queen was also sad, crying at the breakfast table, and later telling us that was a real reaction—and also good cover.

Carolyn, though, didn’t think so: “I think both of them are being a little too extra.” And if Carolyn calls you extra?

Suspicion started flowing immediately: Jeremy suspected both Bobs; Robyn insisted it was not Bob the Drag Queen. Danielle floated Dolores as a suspect to Dylan, who told us, “Danielle, I trust more than anyone in this game.”

A pivotal moment came during one conversation when Robyn said the traitors’ decision was smart, because it raised Housewives suspicions, and that made Wells suspicious of her—as if she was a traitor praising her own decision. I mean, that would be a very Real Housewives thing to do!

The players trekked to the woods to learn what we already knew: the “Trinity of Terror,” as Alan Cumming called them, were waiting to join the game.

I didn’t think I could love Carolyn more as a TV character, but then she told us what she thought when she saw Wes: “Oh my god, I can’t stand that asshole. I don’t want him in the game, and now he’s here.”

At some point during all this, Rob said yet again that “revenge is a dish best served cold,” which gave the episode its title but also what the fuck does that even mean? How is he going to get cold revenge? By being metaphorically cold as a player? If we have to do this, Rob, can we at least lay off the cliches?

For the mission, the players had to collect individual coins and place them into cylinders in front of the Trinity’s cages. A full tube would lower the cage to a platform, and that new player would be able to give a shield to another player.

Before Bob the Drag Queen put a coin in Rob’s tube, Bob said Rob had to throw away his hat because “it’s a fashion crime.”

The players got all the coins just in time, so $50,000 went to the pot and three shields into the game.

In the castle, genius Tom told the three new players that Bob and Carolyn are definitely faithful. Conversations seemed to be pointing toward Robyn and Wells as likely first targets, though Gabby described it as “throwing shit against the wall.”

That’s what happened at the roundtable: eight people got votes. Bob opened it up by calling out Wells, who then called out both Robyn and Sam.

Sandoval accused Chrishell and Jeremy because he pulled off his blindfold so fast he saw Alan Cumming’s skin cells on their shoulders, I guess. Chrishell told Tom “you make me uncomfortable,” and am genuinely not sure why Tom didn’t get more votes just for being a creep.

While not everyone was open—Robyn, at one point, said “are y’all scared to talk?”—we heard a lot from another traitor, too. Danielle said “we really think a Housewife is a traitor,” and pointed out that the murder was “to deflect” from them. She pointed to Robyn and Dolores.

Votes were all over the place: Ayan 1, Wells 5, Delores 1, Tony 1, Ivar 4, Robyn 4, Jeremy 2, Tom 1.

Wells was sent back to the beach to bartend, but first he decided to put on a stupid show, doing a slow clap and I guess making the players momentarily think they’d found a traitor? Then he said, “playing a smart game isn’t always the smartest.” Nor was that line the smartest thing someone’s said in that circle there, buddy.

Curiously, Dylan told Robyn, “if it genuinely isn’t you, then we need to look at Bob the Drag Queen.”

Before the murder, there was the issue of the shields. They were given in secret, which was great, in theory, because that’s one way to give a bit more power to the faithful.

Wes was going to give his to Wells, and ended up giving it to Jeremy, admitting he was “just kissing ass” to get the Survivor players on his side.

Rob gave it to Tony, who told Rob, “they’re after me because of my reputation.” It’s such a Tony witch hunt that absolutely no one voted for him!

Derrick gave his to Dylan. But then Derrick told Danielle, and Wes confirmed to Rob he’d given his to Jeremy. So now the traitors know where all three shields are. Was it likely Dylan, Jeremy, or Tony were getting murdered? Maybe not, but oh would I have liked to see that happen.

The episode ended with more of Rob’s exhausting self-congratulations (“If I were them, I’d be scared”) and revealing himself to the other traitors, who all seemed like they were ready to jump over the railing. I will now eagerly await the other traitors turning on Rob at the roundtable.

Next: episode three. Recap coming Saturday!