Unlucky coincidences put Liam Payne under more pressure Cheryl could ever know

It's been a tragic past few days in showbiz, but there have also been moments that made us smile. Join me, Daily Mirror columnist Jessica Boulton, for Jess Saying, my weekly and witty deep dive into the ups and downs of the past showbiz week…

Monday moves

Poor Nick Knowles. He was in. He was out. And his hips were definitely shaken about (just look at his Charleston). But after all the drama about whether or not he’d be fit to dance on Strictly last Saturday, poor Nick barely got to enjoy his momentous return from injury before the judges rudely sent him (flat)packing back to DIY SOS.

It wasn’t just a bad week for Knowles. Wynne Evans and Katya Jones got social media in a bigger spin than any we’ve seen on the dancefloor so far this series.

I’d say hands up if you’ve already heard about the saga, but: 1. It was near-on impossible to sidestep and 2. It was Wynne allegedly raising his hand a bit too high that started the furore in the first place.

Both Katya and Wynne have since denied there was any bad feeling. The pro then told fans she only ever rolled her eyes, refused to give him a high five, and moved his hand as a “joke”.

I’m not really seeing the punchline. But then again Katya’s never really struck me as having a natural grasp of comedy. A grasp of comedians down the back alley behind a pub, yes. (As Seann Walsh and the rest of us can attest.)

But comic timing? Not so much.

Tight wad tuesday

It’s not unusual for unknown actors to agree to work for peanuts. But when you’re the one and only Fonzie? Well, one would expect Henry Winkler to demand a pretty hefty fee for any film roles.

However this week he left us all bemused… after revealing he did Adam Sandler’s The Waterboy for a very modest amount of dough. Just enough dough to make a singular cookie in fact.

Uh-huh. It must have been Happy Days in the accounts department because the TV icon that is Winkler is such a big fan of Adam’s, he agreed to an actual 11th-hour phone request to film a cameo… in return for a simple baked treat (chocolate chips unconfirmed).

Apparently he got the desperate call from Adam at 11.30pm one night saying an actor hadn’t shown up and could he possibly get down there and fill in? “I shave. I drive. I go. I sit. I get make-up until 3.30 in the morning,” Winkler recalled on Tuesday. “Do you know what I got? A cookie.”

It does beg some questions: How many scenes do you have to do to earn a Jaffa Cake? And what do you get for being Adam’s co-star? A box of Dunkin’ Donuts? One big name in entertainment would have been more than satisfied with this payment schedule, of course.

But if Adam’s set on this dough-based pay, surely Henry’s worth at least a box of cookies… plus an XL cheese-stuffed crust pizza with a side of garlic bread?

After all Linda Evangelista didn’t get out of bed for less than 10,000 a day. Why should The Fonz? (Albeit, in this case we’re talking calories).

Heartbreak Wednesday

It was late on Wednesday when the news about Liam Payne broke. In the following days much was said about the One Direction star – from what was found in his hotel room, to speculation about his relationships and unsettling news about the future of his career.

The news was tragic, shocking and yet sadly not entirely surprising. The happy, determined 16-year-old I met in the early days of the band, had got his dream of becoming a dad himself – but in recent years he openly admitted the price he’d paid for fame had been a hefty one.

It’s not a price his waitress girlfriend can understand. It’s not one the devoted fans can ­understand. It’s not even one his baby mama Cheryl can fully ­understand.

Only four other men can. Bands may have ­experienced the highs and lows of Beatlemania-level fame long before and after One Direction. But 1D’s heyday was also at a time of unprecedented cultural change.

Between 2010 when they were put together on The X Factor and early 2012 when they broke America, the world changed. Completely and irrefutably. Smartphones went from 19% of all phone sales to 74%; Twitter, while launched in 2006, went so “mainstream” it was used in the Arab Spring; Instagram launched and was exploding into a social media force du jour; selfies had become the new ­autograph; and The X Factor was The Unshakeable Undefeatable TV Behemoth.

The world was turned up to 11. It was high on its own brand of speed. And this band of teenage boys were in the eye of the storm. Around 2014, the world “woke” up – literally – smelt the soy milk matcha lattes, and started talking openly about mental ­wellbeing, duty of care and all those buzzwords that so annoy today’s right-whingers on the now rebranded X.

In hindsight it’s easy to see: It was inevitable the band would only ever head in One Direction… and sadly it was the wrong one.

Board prince? Thursday

Prince Harry is no stranger to making waves. But now he’s riding them too. Yup, Hazza has gone full on all-American dude this week after learning to “Hang 10” with the best of them – as proved by a viral video of him surfin’ USA.

So what’s next in his transformation from British Prince of the Realm to California’s Fresh Prince of Bel Heir? He’s already unleashed his cowabunga surfer dude alter ego.

So maybe it’s time Hazza and Meg try kicking back with a tailgate party at the next big NFL game? A morning of hiking (and posting the obligatory fit-spirational selfie) in LA’s famed Runyon Canyon? Or perhaps an afternoon playing baseball at Dodgers Stadium?

I imagine Harry could easily get a few homes runs. For, as we learned from Spare, it won’t be the first time he’s made it to fourth base….. in a field.

Roo the day Friday

If you were in any doubt, it’s well and truly autumn… Ant and Dec have released the first trailer, the cockroaches are getting antsy, and there’s a couple of very nervous kangaroos (who really don’t want their you-know-what handed to them – or anyone – on a plate.)

That’s right it’s I’m A Celeb season. And on Friday, the rumour mill was spinning with reports of the Reverend Richard Coles being the show’s latest signing, joining the likes of Loose Women’s Jane Moore and TikTok star GK Barry (yes, I had to google her).

But most of the talk this week has been about another big name. No, not King Charles – whose visit to Oz does seem fortuitous – but Coleen Rooney.

After her nemesis Rebekah Vardy was on the show in 2017, ITV have apparently splashed out on the Queen Bee of Wags herself. Why? Well, according to reports, bosses are hoping she’ll “spill the beans” on the Wags-at-war Wagatha Christie scandal, obviously.

Yet there might be a little problem with their star signing. Between her Disney+ documentary, Becky’s ­newspaper interviews, the Discovery+ documentary, the Channel 4 drama, the West End play, and the daily reports from the court case…

Surely the only beans left to spill are the ones she’ll be cooking over the jungle campfire?

Picture of the week

Few could ever accuse Vanessa Feltz of being too low-key. (Well, perhaps Liberace.) So it was a huge surprise to see her opt for a decidedly streamlined and elegant day dress for our new at-home shoot and interview that ran in the Mirror this week. This, however, is not it.

This is another dress from the stylist’s rail, and let’s just say, when you live in a Gothic folly, with faux Roman frescos and a bright pink kitchen, “dress down Friday” is not a thing. Orange frills, however, most certainly are.

But it wasn’t just the TV Queen’s interesting attitude to loungewear making us smile this week, the Mirror also serialised her forthcoming new memoir, Vanessa Bares All: Frank, Funny and Fearless.

And believe me, it lives up to its name. If you want juicy, no-holds-barred, honest stories, it’s a treasure trove of gems of which even Elton John would be jealous of.

• What do you think? Have you seen a celeb do something funny? Is there a new star you love? Or is there someone on the TV who really just yanks your chain? Let me know your thoughts on all things showbiz in the comments or via X/Instagram @JessicaBoulton