A woman has gained support online for her bold reaction to her best friend's breakup.
Redditor u/Mindless-Day5597, 27, shared how her childhood best friend Kira, also 27, had recently been dumped by boyfriend Adam.
In the viral post, the poster detailed how she confronted Kira during the emotional fallout, saying the latter's repeated attempts to get close to her husband, Rowan, were the reason behind the breakup. This confrontation left Kira visibly upset. The post has since garnered 8,400 upvotes in the subreddit "Am I The A*****".
"Over the last few months, she's been acting strange around Rowan. Whenever we'd be hanging out with the three of us, or even with Adam there, she'd always find some way to sit next to Rowan, laugh at everything he said, etc. I didn't think anything of it initially because I knew that's kind of her personality, and her and Rowan are friends," the OP explained.
However, Kira's behavior escalated. She started showing up at the OP's house only when Rowan was present and even made an offhand comment about how Rowan was "patient for putting up with OP being too tired to do anything during pregnancy."
For context, OP and Rowan met during college. Kira had initially harbored a crush on Rowan, but he didn't reciprocate and instead fell for OP. At the time, Kira was dating someone else, and after seeking her permission, OP started dating Rowan.
Despite this history, Kira's recent actions crossed the line. At a dinner party two days before the breakup Kira, who had been drinking, repeatedly tried to touch and sit close to Rowan.
"I tried to get her off a few times, and I was getting mad because this was a new line she was crossing. She was slurring about how I 'stole Rowan from her'," OP recounted.
Although Adam seemed unaware of the specifics, he noticed Kira's behavior.
The following day, while hanging out at their friend Shay's house, Kira arrived visibly upset, announcing that Adam had broken up with her. When Kira asked, "Aren't you going to say something?" OP replied, "Maybe Adam wouldn't have left you if you weren't trying to get with Rowan all the time."
This statement shocked their group of friends. Some were frustrated with Kira's behavior, while others accused OP of making a "horrible accusation" and defended Kira as being "friendly with everyone."
Reflecting on the situation, OP admitted, "Maybe this was too harsh to say to her after a breakup and we could've talked privately, not in front of our friends. AITA?"
Expert Insight
Michelle Beaupre, a licensed clinical social worker at Villa Oasis, San Diego, explained that setting boundaries is essential, even in lifelong friendships.
She told Newsweek: "As we become older, we often feel that childhood friendships are bound to us as an extended family, and we have no right to break these connections.
"However, as with any relationship, there should be set boundaries, and if these limits are crossed, it's totally normal to state your feelings and put such a friendship on pause.
"What happened here is Kira, a lifelong friend, crossed a line and showed disrespect to her friend, her husband, and their family. No matter if Kira still has feelings and unresolved attachments, it's not acceptable behavior to flirt and get close to a friend's husband. It's a friend's right to remind Kira about the boundaries and state her truth, even if it hurts Kira."
Reddit Reacts
Redditors had mixed reactions but largely supported OP's decision.
"NTA. Well not entirely. Yes, it was kinda rude to just say that after she had been dumped, but she had been acting like this for a long time," one user commented.
Another added, "OP just needs to dump Kira as a friend because... Kira is no longer a friend to OP. Kira has made it abundantly clear through actions and comments that she wants OP's husband... while OP is pregnant. Kira is despicable and should be booted out of OP and her husband's life."
A third chimed in, "NTA. Drunk minds speak sober thoughts. She meant it. You know she meant it. She just didn't want the consequences that came with it."
Newsweek reached out to u/Mindless-Day5597 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.
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