Eminem has never seemed real.
Pressing play on one of his songs has always felt like gaining admission into a house of mirrors inside of a house of horrors. A twisted distortion of the human experience was around every corner and inside of every rhyme. The imagery repulsed you, the creativity enticed you, the surrealism connected you. Eminem has been one of the greatest lyricists of all-time for the last 25 plus years because he wasn’t a real person, he was your subconscious mind with a license to ill.
His best lines disrupted hip-hop’s monotony of materialism and mobster impersonations by poking fun at how ridiculous it can be at times to be a human. This is a man who “never grew up," grabs a pencil and becomes “a demon who speaks English," and wondered out loud why he should “fix up lyrics while the President gets his dick sucked." The reverence of his skills breaks all generational barriers with '80s legends like Rakim, '90s juggernauts like Jay-Z, aughts titans like Lil Wayne, and millennial Pulitzer Prize winners like Kendrick Lamar left in awe for decades.
This is same artist who was Billboard’s Artist of the Decade for the 2000s, the third most streamed artist of the 2010s, and currently has the one of the highest selling rap albums of 2024 with The Death of Slim Shady.
Let's look back at the best lyrics to ever come out of Eminem’s mouth.
37. “Michaelangelo with a paint gun in a tantrum/ about to explode all over the canvas”- “Rhyme or Reason” (2013)
This line, a standout from the Marshall Mathers LP 2, is quintessential Eminem: an artistic genius with the anger of a petulant child still able to dazzle you with whatever comes out.
36. “Shady when will you be nice to the women?/When Aquaman drowns and the Human Torch starts swimming.” - “Cold Wind Blows” (2010)
Em makes The Boys seem soft. Only Eminem can be this deranged and funny when rapping about superheroes. This line, which comes in the middle of the last verse of “Cold Wind Blows,” helps put a cap on one of his best album intros.
35. “I got a new watch/and two rings with huge rocks/cause rap shit got cats coming out the blue like nude cops”- “Till Hell Freezes Over” (1998)
Eminem historically doesn't floss a lot. But when he does, he finds new ways to say what everyone has been saying. "Till Hell Freezes Over" has a bunch of cool hip-hop lore because it's one of the first songs he recorded with Dr. Dre.
34. “Protestors outside the Shady offices livid/it'll make you think you have the game on lock till they pick it (picket)/only way to explain it is I'm conflicted/walking on eggshells, like if I take too far is this it/part of me gets it and wants to say I'm sorry and fix it/so all my statements are basically contradictive/like using the F-word for gay is wrong and offensive/and insensitive as if saying the R word isn't.” - “Habits” (2024)
Outside of a truly surgical flow that could break rewind buttons, we get an authentic look inside of the mind of someone trying to reconcile who they are with what the world is—while at the same time satirically poking fun at the societal hierarchy of insults.
33. “Gotta make ‘em fear you before you make ‘em feel you/So everybody buy my shit or imma come and kill you”- “I'm Shady” (1999)
Market the shock but sell the skills was the modus operandi for Slim Shady.
32. “Everyone's pissing me off/even the No Limit tank looks like a middle finger sideways flipping me off.”- “Bad Influence” (1999)
These rhymes came from the underground Eminem days. Before Eminem signed to a major label, he was even more unruly, and could make stoner observations like this sound like the funniest thing you heard that day.
31. “You beef with me/imma even the score equally/take you on Jerry Springer and beat ya ass legally”- “Role Model” (1999)
On the surface, it’s simply a clever way of threatening someone, which all rappers do. But, in retrospect, it’s an astute look at how America already had a thirst for “real people” being violent. Eminem just quenched it.
30. “By the looks of ‘em, you would swear that Jaws was coming/by the screams of ‘em, you would swear I’m sawing someone/By the way they’re running, you would swear the law was coming/ it’s now or never and tonight it’s all or nothing.” - “Rabbit Run” (2002)
Sounding like a buzzsaw ripping through the beat, this 8 Mile soundtrack deep cut is some of Eminem’s best inspirational bars ever. You’d be ready to run through a wall or battle rap Captain America after hearing bars like these.
29. “You pussies can’t even scratch me hard/It’s like fucken cats declawed tryna jack me off” - “I'm Gone” (2004)
Eminem’s feud with Murder Inc. was like if Superman finally had a target he didn’t need to hold back on. "I'm Gone,” which appeared on Kay Slay's compilation album The Streetsweeper Vol. 2: The Pain From the Game, is just a devastating attack on Ja Rule. There’s emasculating someone, and then there’s this.
28. “From doing a song with Method [Man]/To begging to be accepted/I’m pegging Fred [Durst] with the bottle of dye he used to bleach his head with.”- “Girls” (2001)
At one point, Eminem was laying waste to everyone on TRL’s top five list with him, and playing the class clown in pop culture. Poor Fred Durst caught a bad one with "Girls," a bonus track that appeared on D12's debut album.
27. “You dealin' with a few true villains/
who stand inside of the booth, truth-spillin'/
And spit true feelings until our tooth fillings/
come flyin' up out of our mouths, now rewind it.” - “Forever” (2009)
Eminem's verse on the mega posse cut with hip-hop’s elite is not even a Top 10 verse from the rapper. But, at the time, fans were skeptical that the accent-wielding Eminem that appeared on Relapse could still compete with the rappers dominating charts. But he had a show-stealing performance here, making it one of the most important verses of his career.
26. “You’re all aware/I don’t got it all upstairs/I guess that’s why I’m an addict (Attic) and it’s so small up there.”- “Evil Twin” (2013)
The initial reaction to so many of Eminem’s best rhymes is “huh” before your brain starts thinking like him and you let out an audible “ohhhhh” once the surprise washes over you.
25. “So which one are you? [DM]X, Luther, Pac or Michael?
Just keep singing' that same song, recycled
We'd all much rather get along than fight you
Me and Hailie dance to your songs, we like you
And you don't really wanna step inside no mic booth (Uh-huh)
Come on now, you know the white boy'll bite you”- “Bump Heads” (2002)
Ja Rule could’ve filed a lawsuit for aggravated assault against Eminem for the entirety of their beef. Em was just on his ass constantly. The stanza above is one of his best.
24. “Have you ever experienced spirits in lyrics when you hear ’em
’Til you scared to stare into any mirrors when you near ’em?”- "American Psycho" (2001)
Eminem’s internal rhyme wizardry paired with the horror movie styled suspense was unmatched by anyone in the early 2000s. On "American Psycho," one of the best D12 songs ever, he rapped how a Stanley Kubrick film looked.
23. “Will Smith doesn't have to cuss in his records to sell records. Well I do/So fuck him and fuck you too”- “The Real Slim Shady” (2000)
Piercing the fourth wall with a middle finger and making one of the coolest actors of the time look like the most uncool rapper was child’s play for peak Eminem. So many rappers hid behind subliminals. Eminem put a name on each bullet he shot.
22. “Failing in school, smart aleck wit/helped me to rebel against shit so well and vent/so eloquently, yet I was irrelevant/soon as I stopped giving a fuck I started to sell a bit (celibate).” -“Renaissance” (2024)
While Eminem’s flow of the early 2000s was more digestible than his flows from later years, his command of it is at an all-time high now where he can nimbly place a rhyme on almost every part of a beat while still flipping words that serve a purpose to the rhyme scheme—rather than just rhyming words.
21. “While I do pop pills, I keep my tube socks filled/and pop the same shit that got Tupac killed”- “Busa Rhyme” (1999)
Only a few years after Tupac died, Eminem was assuming the mantle of most controversial rapper in the game, in part, by being unafraid to invoke the late rapper’s passing. This is the same man who called himself “white ‘Pac” and no one really disagreed.
20. “I ain't gonna eat, I ain't gonna sleep
Ain't gonna breathe 'til I see what I wanna see
And what I wanna see is you go to sleep in the dirt
Permanently
You just being hurt
This ain't gonna work for me, it just wouldn't be
Sufficient enough 'cause we are just gonna be
Enemies as long as we breathe, I don't ever see
Either of us comin' to terms where we can agree”- “Go To Sleep” (2003)
Benzino still hasn’t got over the ass whooping Eminem handed that man 22 years ago, especially on “Go 2 Sleep,” his first and only DMX collaboration. Other rhymes below it are wittier and lyrically denser. But, the vitriol here was as visceral as watching a lion tear a prey apart limb by limb.
19. “If Shady said it, Shady meant it/I stay demented/I'll throw a stroller at you…with a baby in it.”- "Stir Crazy" (1999)
"Stir Crazy" is a collaboration with Deric "D-Dot" Angelettie, who used to rap under the comic pen name the Mad Rapper. But this line proves Em is the funnier rapper here. You shouldn't laugh, but you do, and that’s when Slim Shady is unparalleled.
18. “Been a bad boy since diapers and Gerber/My first words were bleep bleep and curse curse.” -”First Words” Freestyle (1998)
This was a late '90s classic, a freestyle where Em made verses out of random words floated out by Em's manager Paul Rosenberg. He’s been a censor’s worst nightmare for nearly 30 years.
17. “Shady records was 80 seconds away from The Towers/Some cowards fucked with the wrong building, they meant to hit ours.”- “Patiently Waiting” (2003)
Eminem’s early G-Unit era might have had some of the hardest bars by him, verses that absolutely shook the culture. This collaboration with 50 Cent, which was featured on Get Rich or Die Tryin', felt like the birth of an evil empire.
16. “Time to eat the vocals and shit out ProTools/
I know you still want me to ill out, don’t you?/
Hoping the old Slim’s gonna spill out/
Open fire on your whole camp, with this spit, I roast you/
So, chill out, no, you/
Hoes couldn’t roast me with the shit I wrote you/
Then I took a stand, went at Tan-Face, and practically cut my motherfucking fan base in half and still outsold you.”- “Chloraseptic (Remix)” (2017)
Eminem with a target is the scariest Eminem there is, and his Revival critics pumped his veins with enough venom to unload one of his best verse since returning to rap full-time in 2009.
15. “Five mics in The Source, ain't holding my fucken breath/But I’ll suffocate for the respect before I breathe to collect the fucken check.” - “Say What You Say” (2002)
The former Source Awards Lyricist of the Year and Unsigned Hype recipient was equally hurt and infuriated by his magnum opus The Marshall Mathers LP dominating the charts but not receiving the classic stamp by “HipHop’s bible.” The rhyme that declared war on The Source and started one of hip-hop’s most epic beefs on wax could double as the ultimate hustler's motto.
14. “Had you on pins and needles when I spoke to you all/felt my pain, it’s almost like I poked voodoo dolls”- "Medicine Man" (2015)
Remember when I said Eminem isn’t real? Here’s the best example of how that is in what is the fiercest verse of the last 20 years. Succinctly explaining how our shock at his lyrics was an emotional gateway to empathy while positioning himself as the mastermind of it all is the very definition of brilliant.
13. “I'm sorry, Puff, but I don't give a fuck
If this chick was my own mother, I'd still fuck her with no rubber
And cum inside her and have a son and a new brother
At the same time and just say that it ain't mine—what's my name?”- “I'm Back” (2000)
No one has ever spoken about Jennifer Lopez in this manner most likely because no one’s brain would ever allow them to reach such depths of depravity. For many, this is one of the first times they ever put their hand on their mouth to not only cover the gasp of shock but the chuckle that came after.
12. “I’m sicker than a Tupac dedication to Biggie”- “Scary Movie” (1998)
Simple, effective, timely, and the knockout punch from a heavyweight verse that still holds up to anything Eminem has ever spit.
11. “Sometimes I feel like loadin' this rifle
And climbin' the roof at night and hidin' outside to snipe you
It's not that I don't like you
It's just that when I'm not behind the mic, I'm a person who's just like you” - “Don't Approach Me” (2000)
Believe it or not, the rhymes that cemented Eminem’s legacy are the ones that humanized the spectacle. The balancing act between stardom and privacy was a constant struggle in Eminem’s early days and produced some of the profound dissections on the cognitive dissonance of celebrity that led to “Stan,” “The Way I Am,” and “Sing For The Moment.” He was one of the first 21st century rappers to bring this thinking to the mainstream.
10. “Sick, sick dreams of picnic scenes
Two kids, sixteen, with M-16s and ten clips each
And them shits reach through six kids each
And Slim gets blamed in Bill Clint's speech to fix these streets?” - “Remember Me” (2000)
After the Columbine school shooting, violence in music was blamed as a motivator, and Eminem took that personally. Uncovering societal hypocrisies while also tearing a beat to shreds is par for the course for one of the best rappers ever.
9. “Go to war with the Mormons/take a bath with the Catholics in holy water/no wonder they tried to hold me under longer.” - “Renegade” (2001)
There’s a reason this song keeps getting brought up whenever discussing Eminem. Did Eminem kill Jay-Z on his own song? That’s debatable (not really). What’s undeniable is how this bar subverts the pacifistic foundation of these religions in order to accentuate Eminem’s badness.
8. “When I grab a pencil and squeeze it between fingers/ I'm not a rapper, I'm a demon who speaks English” - “3hree6ix5ive” (1998)
Has there ever been a better four-word description of Slim Shady than “demon who speaks English?” I didn’t think so.
7. “Slim Shady/hotter than a set of twin babies/in a Mercedes-Benz with the windows up/ when the temp goes up/to the mid 80s”- “Forgot About Dre” (1999)
“My Name Is” introduced him to the world, but “Forgot About Me” put Eminem on the lips of every hip-hop head with one of the most popular choruses in hip-hop history. This particular rhyme shows that while some rappers are hot, Eminem is hellish.
6. “My middle finger won’t go down; how do I wave?/And this is how you want me to teach kids how to behave?”- “Role Model" (1999)
The Slim Shady LP has the zaniest lyrics Eminem has ever put on wax. At the same time, these are the foundations of the satire he would grow to refine into his calling card. The debate on artistic responsibility in child development has never been as funny as this.
5. “His palms are sweaty/Knees weak, arms are heavy/There’s vomit on his sweater already/Mom’s spaghetti”- “Lose Yourself” (2002)
The rhyme that inspired hundreds of parodies and a restaurant, and helped get hip-hop its first Best Original Song win at the Oscars has to be on any list of the best Eminem lyrics ever. When the sun explodes and civilization is survived by roaches and Law & Order reruns, there will still be someone talking about regurgitating some fine pasta.
4. “But don't blame me when little Eric jumps off of the terrace
You shoulda been watchin' him, apparently you ain't parents” - “Who Knew” (2000)
Children should not be raised through headphones and speakers more than the parental figures in their lives. In one rhyme, Eminem perfectly summed up how every celebrity has probably felt at one point. This is one of the most profound lyrics in his entire discography.
3. “It's like the boy in the bubble who never could adapt/I'm trapped/If I could go back I never would've rapped/I sold my soul to the devil I'll never get it back/I just want to leave this game with level head intact”- “Say Goodbye to Hollywood” (2002)
Without a doubt, this is the most underrated rhyme in Eminem’s expansive discography. No lyrical gymnastics, murderous theatrics or metaphors needed. Just brutally honest rhymes that sound like we’re intruding on a therapy session of the biggest artist in the world at that time. Eminem laid the blueprint for the megarich and ultra successful rappers to shed their armor and show their flaws.
2. “Hi, kids, do you like violence?/
Wanna see me stick nine-inch nails through each one of my eyelids?” - “My Name Is” (1999)
The rhyme that started it all. Once these words left his mouth, reality was never the same again. Seriously, these simple two lines are up there with other classic introductions, like "It was all a dream..." or "Thinking of a master plan..."
1. “It goes: Reggie, Jay-Z, 2Pac and Biggie
André from OutKast, Jada, Kurupt, Nas, and then me
But in this industry, I'm the cause of a lot of envy
So when I'm not put on this list, the shit does not offend me.” - “Till I Collapse” (2002)
In terms of replayability, longevity, and Cultural significance within hip-hop, there’s not a single collection of words Eminem has ever said that tops this flurry of respect on the best song from his best album. Even though Eminem would grow to become someone who definitely gets offended about not being on this list, he still let the 7.6 million people who brought a copy of The Eminem Show in 2002 know exactly what real hip-hop is. For that, Eminem is forever goated.