A man has been praised online for refusing to help his wife with housework.
The Reddit post, shared by u/nylver1, quickly went viral, with many users defending the 28-year-old man's decision and criticizing his 27-year-old wife.
Racking up 9,200 upvotes in less than 24 hours, the electrician explained that he earns S60,000 per year, while his wife, an accountant, earns $55,000. However, two months ago, she decided she didn't want to return to her job after five months off with their first child.
"My wife told me that she would feel guilt and sadness if we put our child in daycare; therefore, she wants to stay home with him," he wrote.
"I suggested therapy, but she is very persistent and says nothing a therapist would say will change her feelings."
He soon felt like he had "no choice" but to work out how much he would need to work to "compensate her income."
Usually, he works 45 hours a week, but now he must work ten-hour shifts daily to fund them both. His wife agreed to do all of the childcare and housework if she could resign, so he agreed.
For one month, she "kept her word" but then started to ask for help with the chores. However, he refused.
"[Two] days ago, she told me that she is tired and wants me to make dinner, and I flat-out refused and told her she is breaking her promise. I made it very clear that she shouldn't expect ANYTHING from me when it comes to housework.
"She looked furious, but she got up and made dinner, and since then, she has been giving me the silent treatment. I'm full of anger and resentment right now. At first, she got me taking 25 more hours a week, and now she is breaking her promise and trying to manipulate me by giving the silent treatment. I'm losing my mind."
Newsweek reached out to u/nylver1 for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.
Should The Stay-at-Home Parent Do All Of The Chores?
Kate Daly, a relationship expert and co-founder of online divorce services company Amicable, explained that the stay-at-home parent shouldn't be responsible for all of the chores.
"Both partners should recognize and value each other's contributions—whether it's earning income or managing the home—and strive to share responsibilities where possible to prevent burnout and resentment.
"Regularly checking in with each other and actively listening to each other's needs is essential to ensuring both partners feel supported and valued. Productive conversations can lead to creative solutions, such as enlisting help from friends or family for childcare or exploring more sustainable work patterns for the future.
"Resentment is one of the greatest threats to a relationship. By addressing these issues openly and collaboratively, couples can foster a stronger partnership and create a more balanced, supportive home environment."
How Does The Silent Treatment Impact An Argument?
The silent treatment can be "highly damaging" in an argument, said Daly, as it creates distance, intensifies feelings of rejection and blocks communication, preventing resolution.
"Instead of withdrawing, couples should strive to express their emotions calmly and constructively. If a pause is needed to cool off, it's important to communicate this clearly and respectfully (e.g., 'I need some time to gather my thoughts and will come back to discuss this later.'). This approach maintains respect, preserves connection and creates space for productive dialogue. By addressing conflicts openly and avoiding harmful behaviors, couples can strengthen their relationship and navigate challenges more effectively."
Reddit Reacts
So far, the post has almost 3,000 comments, and the top one has 11,000 upvotes.
It said: "It sounds to me like she underestimated just how much work goes into being a stay-at-home mom, as well as how exhausting you working to cover for lost income would be. I think you both need to sit down and clear the air when it comes to grievances, or your built-up resentment toward each other is going to tank your relationship. I would suggest she look into [work from home] or a part-time job to help monetarily so that you're able to cut back some hours and help around the house. NTA."
Another said: "You need to talk to your wife. You're both filling up with resentment, and it will destroy your marriage at this rate. You two need to revisit the deal, and if she can't handle the current situation, then you need to revisit her going back to work. Maybe she can find something part-time, 2-3 days a week, so the kid doesn't have to go to daycare every day, and you don't have to work 70 hours a week, and she doesn't have to do 100% of the housework. Have the hard conversation. So NTA for sticking to the original agreement, but if you don't sit down and have the hard conversation, you will be TA for that."
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