Getting an outfit on. Leaving the house. Eating veggies. As any parent knows, any of these basic daily tasks become difficult, sometimes impossible, when it's a child you're convincing to do them. Sometimes a little white lie can help in the moment. From leveraging Santa's naughty list, to pretending that pack of Haribo isn't sat in the kitchen cupboard, creative truth-telling can help smooth over challenging situations, and make life easier. But is lying to children a good thing? White lies are a historic part of parenting. Old wives tales like carrots help you see in the dark, and eating bread crusts makes your hair curly have long been used to persuade children to make healthy choices. Online, there's a discussion around if we should always strive tell our kids the truth, even when it's difficult. Some argue that if your child ever finds out that you've lied, this could severely damage the relationship. Also because children can model parent's behaviour, it's extremely important to showcase honesty and illustrate how to have tough conversations, some say. Whether it's death or what's happening in the world politically, magic and fairy tales can feel like an easy way to explain these big concepts, while still conveying the root of a truth. One parent could argue that counts as lying, whereas another might not. One reader, a mother of an eight and one-year-old, says she tries not to lie. 'I always tell my eldest son the truth - I wouldn't use a white lie to swerve a tricky conversation - I'll just explain the situation and my reasons and he always understands.' Admittedly, she has three exceptions to this approach. 'Santa, Elf on the Shelf and the Tooth Fairy. We go hard to those three in my family,' she says. But one reader disagreed. 'I’ve never felt guilty telling my child white lies,' she admits. 'Until now, they’ve only ever been about harmless things which I know will ultimately benefit her or not matter,' the mother of one told us. Despite their pragmatic approach, lying or not lying to kids is an issue they've noticed among their parent friends. 'I have a friend who refuses to lie to his kids about Santa, thinking it builds a rocky foundation where your kids won’t know what they can believe,' she says. Ultimately, she thinks white lies aren't harmful however. 'My thinking is: if we all survived it (relatively unscarred) it can’t be too earth-shattering when a child finds out their parents were in on it? 'Plus, Parenting is hard enough. If a white lie here or there encourages them to get their shoes on or turn off Peppa Pig then you do what you need to do!'
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