Meet Donald Trump’s Brick-Shittingly Scary New Cabinet, and Everyone Else Advising Him in a Second Term

On January 20, 2025, Donald Trump will become the president of the United States for a second time despite, among other things, suggesting Americans ingest bleach in the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic and inspiring a violent attack on the Capitol that left multiple people dead. The first time Trump was in office, his Cabinet included relatively mainstream Republicans—like Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross and Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao. Many of the individuals he put in top advisory roles—such as retired Marine Corps general John Kelly as White House chief of staff and former Goldman Sachs president and CEO Gary Cohn as National Economic Council director—also had relevant experience. But this time around, Trump is expected to almost exclusively hire people from the far-right whose number one qualification is total loyalty to him.

Speaking to Fox News shortly after the election, Donald Trump Jr., who is “heavily involved on the transition,” indicated that he was focused on installing people who won’t speak up if they disagree with his dad, saying he is looking to staff the administration with individuals who “don’t think that they know better than the duly elected president of the United States.”

The most powerful and coveted gigs are obviously Cabinet positions, which technically require Senate approval. However, many served in “acting” capacities during Trump’s term, allowing them to get around that requirement. In addition, Trump has demanded that Senate Republicans let him bypass the confirmation process altogether by agreeing to “recess appointments.” That scares the hell out of at least one staunch conservative, but it doesn’t mean it won’t happen!

So far, Trump’s Cabinet nominees include:

Matt Gaetz, Attorney General

Is this Donald Trump trying his hand at trolling? An attempt to get millions of people to shout “What the f—ck?!” at the same time? An elaborate lowering of the bar, so that when he nominates, say a serial killer to serve as surgeon general, people will be like “eh, this isn't that crazy”? It's potentially all of the above. In addition to having less experience working as an attorney than most law firm associates, Gaetz is currently under investigation by the House Ethics Committee for alleged sexual misconduct, which he denies.

Fun fact: In his memoir, Firebrand, Gaetz wrote, of Trump: “The president has called me when I was in my car, asleep in the middle of the night on my Longworth Office cot, on the throne, on airplanes, in nightclubs, and even in the throes of passion (yes, I answered).”

Kristi Noem, Secretary of Homeland Security

Trump tapped the South Dakota governor for one of the most significant jobs in his administration, given his pledge to “carry out the largest domestic deportation operation in American history.” Despite not running a border state, Noem has been outspoken in her hardline immigration stance. She has previously called for punishing the “sanctuary cities” that protect undocumented immigrants. And last April Noem was banned from visiting three separate reservations that comprise about 10% of South Dakota’s 75,789.6 square miles of land area after she claimed that Mexican drug cartels “have been successful in recruiting tribal members to join their criminal activity” and that “some tribal leaders…are personally benefiting from the cartels being here.”

Fun fact: If confirmed, Noem would be the first Homeland secretary in history to have written about leading her family dog to a gravel pit and shooting him at close range.

Marco Rubio, Secretary of State

The GOP senator who mocked Trump’s spray tan and hand size in his 2016 presidential bid, has since become a loyal ally; at one point he was said to be on Trump‘s 2024 short list for VP.

On Capitol Hill, the Florida congressman has a reputation as a foreign policy hawk. In April, he voted against a $95 billion aid package for Ukraine and, in equally worrisome news for the war-torn nation, has said the war started by Russia will likely end with a “negotiated settlement” instead of a victory for the country Vladimir Putin invaded.

Fun fact: If things go south between Trump and Rubio—as they did with Trump’s first secretary of state, who he would later call “dumb as a rock” and “lazy as hell”—the incoming president already has a derogatory nickname for the guy: “Little Marco.”

Lee Zeldin, Environmental Protection Agency administrator

At a time when scientists say we're verging on a point of no return on climate change, the selection of Zeldin is not a great sign for the planet, if an entirely expected one. In 2020, the former New York congressman received the worst score on the League of Conservation Voters’ 2020 National Environmental Scorecard of the entire New York delegation; he has a lifetime score of 14% from the environmental advocacy organization. In an interview, he said his priorities on “day one and the first 100 days” are to “roll back regulations.”

Fun fact: Zeldin voted to overturn the 2020 election results after a mob attacked the Capitol on January 6.

Pete Hegseth, Secretary of Defense

If you’re familiar with the name Pete Hegseth, it's probably because the guy is a Fox News host and, if confirmed, would be the first Fox and Friends cohost in US history to become a Cabinet secretary. Hegseth joined the Minnesota National Guard and later the Army National Guard, serving at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, Iraq, and Afghanistan, achieving the rank of major. He unsuccessfully ran for Senate in 2012 and joined Fox News as a contributor two years later. In 2019, Hegseth reportedly pressed Trump to pardon a number of military members who had been charged with war crimes, including the shooting of civilians; Trump ultimately pardoned three individuals. According to The New York Times, “a former Pentagon official from Mr. Trump’s first term questioned Mr. Hegseth’s lack of experience—other than serving in the military—and raised concerns about his ability to win Senate confirmation, even with a Republican majority in the chamber.” Days before Trump nominated him, Hegseth said in an interview, “I'm straight up just saying we should not have women in combat roles.”