Shannon Beador could walk away from her full-time role on The Real Housewives of Orange County ahead of its upcoming 19th season.
Reflecting on the hardships she faced amid season 18, which was preceded by the debut of ex-boyfriend John Janssen‘s relationship with Alexis Bellino, 47, and a DUI arrest, and followed by John’s filing of a $75,000 lawsuit against her, Shannon, 60, admitted that if certain people are asked back, she may quit.
“It was very difficult to go through,” Shannon admitted to PEOPLE about RHOC season 18 on October 31.
As she continues to fight her legal battle against John, 62, who accused her of refusing to pay him for a facelift she got in 2022, Shannon noted that she was unwilling to film with certain cast members.
“[It] depends on who I would be on the season with,” she explained. “And I’m not saying that in a threatening way. I experienced some time with people that were very unhealthy for me to be around.”
“That’s important in my life right now, to make healthy choices and to separate myself from toxic situations,” she continued.
Since the start of season 18, Shannon said she made personal progress and is in a much better place.
“I really was a hot mess at the end of last season,” she shared. “I was at that reunion just totally focused on, you got to clear John’s name, you got to clear John’s name. And you can see it — I look exhausted. I’m puffy. I wasn’t good. So I’m happy. I hope that people will see that I am taking life seriously and I’m doing whatever I can in my power to better my life to become a better person.”
Part of that, for Shannon, means setting healthy boundaries and understanding that when it comes to viewers, they are watching the show for entertainment.
“If I were on the other side, I’d want to see it myself. But really what matters is what I think. I hope they enjoy the show … I hope that people say, ‘Okay, she’s working on herself, so good for her,’ but I don’t need pats on the back,” she explained. “I don’t need sympathy.”
“I got it, and I feel strong about that,” she added.
The Real Housewives of Orange County season 18 reunion begins on Thursday, November 7, with part one of three at 9/8c on Bravo.