Commercials You Know by Heart if You Grew Up in the ’90s

1 month ago 2

Nostalgia is a strange and complex emotion. I never would have predicted decades ago that when I was an adult, I would get strangely wistful for the days when TV shows would stop every 15 minutes to sell you sodas and cars and toys.

But back then no one knew that in 30 years time, television advertising would feel like an archaic relic of a bygone era. Streaming TV didn’t exist; hell, the internet barely existed back then! Neither did DVRs, for that matter. If you were watching TV, odds are you were doing it live — with no way to pause, rewind, or fast forward through those commercials. So you wound up watching a lot of advertisements. Some played so endlessly that they became permanently etched in the corners of your mind, waiting to burst forth the next time someone passes a jar of Grey Poupon mustard.

If that sensation sounds familiar, then this list is for you. It contains 25 ads that you probably have memorized if you grew up in the 1990s. And yes, you can watch them all below — but be warned. Revisiting them may jar something loose in your brain next. Next thing you know, you’ll be singing about fresh goes better in life with Mentos.

Got Milk?

In this iconic commercial of the ’90s, a history expert is unable to answer a trivia question and win an easy $10,000 because his mouth is full of peanut butter and he just ran out of milk. He tries in vain to spit out the name “Aaron Burr!” but without milk, all is lost. Then, the famous kicker: “Got milk?” This ad, which played endlessly through the ‘90s, was directed by none other than future Transformers filmmaker Michael Bay.

Wasssaaaaaap?

Wasssaaaaaap?” In the late 1990s and into the early 2000s everyone was saying it, and all for one reason — and no, not because people at that time were just very curious what was up with other people. It’s because in this Budweiser spot, everyone was saying “Wasssaaaaaap?” That was the whole thing! A huge pop culture moment, all from dudes in a beer ad saying one word over and over.

The Budweiser Frogs

Speaking of Budweiser, a few years earlier they took the ad world by storm with a Super Bowl commercial about three frogs endlessly croaking the company’s name. This commercial had its own future A-list director — Gore Verbinski, who went on to make the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. The first Bud frog ad proved so popular it led to a whole series of commercials where the frogs met other creatures like chameleons and a ferret.

Mentos: The Freshmaker

In the 1990s, there was only one mint allowed if you were a hip teenager type looking to get the upper hand one some stuffy, snoody grownups. Mentos! It was the Freshmaker! In a famous series of ’90s commercials, assorted good-looking youths would brainstorm clever solutions to adult-related problems while popping Mentos into their mouths. They never did figure out how not to make Mentos explode in soda though.

Grey Poupon

If you’ve ever been driving along in your Rolls-Royce and had a starchy British dude pull up alongside and ask “Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?” this commercial is why. (If that’s never happened to you, just take my word for it; these commercials were hugely popular. And if you owned a bottle of Grey Poupon back then, and you didn’t ask “Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?” before you poured some on your hot dog, they put you in jail.)

“Riiiiiicolaaaaaaa”

One lozenge loomed over the rest in the 1990s, and it was the one advertised by dudes in the Alps screaming “Riiiiiicolaaaaaaa!” and blowing an oversized horn. What does that have to do with soothing your throat? You know, I never thought about it before. I guess maybe if you’re yelling  “Riiiiiicolaaaaaaa!” at full volume all day, you probably have a pretty scratchy voice? If a Ricola is good enough for these guys, it’d be good enough for you too, right?

Chia Pet

It’s the pottery that grows! Just soak your Chia overnight, then spread your seeds. Keep it watered and watch it grow!.I’ve never owned a Chia Pet in my life, but I’ve seen so many Chia Pet commercials throughout my lifetime that I know how they work anyway. Ch-ch-ch-chia!

READ MORE: 25 Commercials You Know By Heart If You Grew Up in the ’80s

Tombstone Pizza

To this day, when someone asks me “What do you want on your pizza?” I have a very hard time not instinctively responding (in a haughty British accent) “Pepperoni and cheese!” That’s because of this ubiquitous Tombstone frozen pizza commercial from the 1990s, in which a man awaiting a firing squad turns down a blindfold and a cigarette, but demands a pepperoni and cheese Tombstone when asked. I must have watched this ad at least 2,000 times.

Miss Cleo

This commercial advertising the psychic services of one Miss Cleo became so legendary it got its own documentary on HBO Max a few years ago titled Call Me Miss Cleo, which unraveled the story of the woman behind the character. (Her real name was Youree Dell Harris.)

Robert Loggia for Minute Maid

This might get my vote for the best commercial of the ’90s. A kid refuses to drink a new kind of Minute Maid OJ. He doesn’t trust his parents when they tell him he’d like it. Okay, so who would he trust? “I don’t know, Robert Loggia?” the boy quips, naming the old school character actor. Of course, Loggia himself then walks in and grumbles “Billy! Minute Maid Orange Tangerine tastes great!” (“If you say so, Mr. Loggia!” the kid responds.) So bizarre.

The Taco Bell Chihuahua

The ’80s had Spuds MacKenzie. The ’90s had the Taco Bell Chihuahua (played by a cute little critter named Gidget) who appeared in a series of ads that all ended the same way: With Gidget (through the use of CGI) declaring “Yo quiero Taco Bell.” Although the ads were eventually protested in some quarters for promoting negative stereotypes, they were initially so popular that talking Taco Bell Chihuahua plush dolls were produced in 1998.

Crossfire

The board game Crossfire had already been on toy-store shelves for decades by the 1990s. But it got a major bump in profile at that time by a very eye-catching TV commercial that featured kids playing Crossfire in a vaguely dystopian setting. “It’s some time in the future! The ultimate challenge: Crossfire!” an agitated narrator screamed, before a hair metal band launched into a theme song that concluded on a hilariously high note (“Cross-fiyaaaaaaaa!”) This commercial makes this game look incredible. Having played it (surely as a result of this ad’s successful brainwashing) I can say with authority: It wasn’t nearly as exciting as this trailer made it look.

Creepy Crawlers

Another popular ’90s kids toy with an unforgettable jingle, Creepy Crawlers is (I just learned doing a little online research) a toy that dates back decades, and was originally known as the “Thingmaker.” It used colorful goop heated inside moulds to produce rubbery creatures of assorted shapes and styles. After fading from popularity (in part because some government groups had concerns over children cooking chemicals with heat in their basements, those killjoys), the Thingmaker returned in the early 1990s with new branding and that unforgettable “Creepy Crawlers” jingle.

Bubble Tape

Gum innovations of the 1990s brought us Bubble Tape, a six-foot long roll of bubble gum sold in a coil that unfurled from a dispenser. And I know it was six-feet long because the commercials for Bubble Tape all ended the same way: With the announcer declaring it was “Six feet of bubble gum. For you! Not them!” (Them being squares like parents, lunch ladies, and assorted other Olds.)

Ring Pop

It was a ring around your finger, Ring Pop. It was a juicy jewel of flavor, Ring Pop. A lollipop without a stick, a ring of flavor you could lick. Reader, I recalled all of that information from memory; I didn’t need to rewatch the old Ring Pop TV commercial, because it’s lodged in my brain for all of eternity. I forgot to take a chicken out of the oven last week and burned it to a crisp, but I will never forget the Ring Pop song.

Gushers

While the 1980s were the prime decade of fruit snack innovation, the ’90s had its share of bold new fruit-adjacent treats. The one that made the biggest impression was Gushers; jewel-shaped snacks with fruity gunk inside that “gushed” when you bit into them. Their distinctive ads throughout the 1990s featured kids’ heads bursting with gunky goodness. They were all vaguely nightmarish — why would a kid want to eat something that made their mouth explode? — but this particular one, where kids’ heads transformed into fruits, was especially disturbing. And guess what? It worked! Gushers broke through the crowded fruit snack market and are still sold in stores today.

Pure Moods

The ’90s belonged to Pure Moods, a series of new-age music compilations heavily marketed through TV commercials. You could sail away Enya, ride a chariot of fire with Vangelis, and head to Twin Peaks to Angelo Badalamenti. (The song selection is weirder than you remember.) These commercials never worked on me; I never dialed the 1-800 number or sent my $15.99 for cassette (or $17.99 for CD!) to the P.O. Box in Colorado Springs. But now that I’ve rewatched the commercial, I might have to fire this up on Spotify.

1-800 COLLECT

Pure Moods wasn’t the only 1-800 number in heavy ad rotation in the 1990s. There were endless commercials hyping the various options customers had for collect calls as well, including the ever-present 1-800-COLLECT. I’m still not sure why this was a superior option to a standard collect call — and I’m not about to explain the concept of collect calls to younger readers, we’d be here all day — but I can say that there were many commercials for this service. The one above features Ed O’Neill, then the star of Married... With Children, in his recurring role as the leader of the “Phone Patrol.” There were others with David Spade and even Larry “Bud” Melman from Late Night With David Letterman.

Toys “R” Us

The signature Toys “R” Us jingle debuted prior to the 1990s, but for a lot of kids it’s the version in this 1991 commercial — with the cool-ified “I don’t wanna grow up / Don’t wanna grow up!” intro — that made the biggest impression. (For some reason this commercial makes me think of Poochie from The Simpsons. This Geoffrey gets biz-zay!!) I know Toys “R” Us is still around in some places and in some forms, mostly as the toy section in Macy’s department stores, but the Toys “R” Us promoted in these ads was a child’s paradise — to the extreme!

Crocodile Mile

“You run! You slide! You hit a bump and take a dive!” Back in the day, these sort of Slip and Slide-esque backyard water toys never lived up to the excitement of their commercials. In fact, I vividly remember one painful bruise I got on my stomach from diving onto one that wasn’t adequately slippery.) But how could any slide live up to the thrill of Crocodile Mile, an Aussie-themed rubber slide with a cartoon alligator on it? Viewed today, this looks hopelessly cheesy. In the ’90s, if you had one of these friction-burn generators, you were the coolest kid on your block.

New Trix Cereal

Here’s one thing I’ve learned through the years: Kids are dumb. What difference does it make whether Trix are shaped like little colored balls or miniature fruits? They taste the same either way. But when Trix “upgraded” their cereal in exactly this way it drove kids wild. This commercial was the talk of elementary schools all over the country. Looking at it now, you have to wonder: Why can’t the Trix rabbit eat the cereal? Why are Trix just for kids? Is there some rule against giving rabbits sugar? The poor rabbit’s hungry and the cereal is in his name! These cruel kids are starving the poor guy.

Pepsi’s “New Look. Same Great Taste.”

This ad from the early ’90s introduced a redesigned Pepsi can (and the amusing slogan “New Look. Same Great Taste”) with a scantily clad Cindy Crawford, then one of the biggest supermodels on the planet. I don’t know if the ad improved Pepsi’s sales, but for some reason this commercial made quite an impression on me when I was 12 years old. I can’t figure out why...

Gatorade’s Be Like Mike

No athlete was as ever-present in TV commercials throughout the 1990s as Michael Jordan. The NBA legend was famous for appearing in spots for Nike, Hanes, Coca-Cola, and more. But the spot that is best remembered may be the one he did for Gatorade, which gave MJ his own theme song: “Be Like Mike,” in which a chorus of kids sing praise unto Jordan and his great basketball skill. (The implication: Drink Gatorade, and you too can someday dunk a basketball.) The ads and the slogan became so associated with Jordan that when Hollywood made a movie a few years later about a kid who gets magic basketball powers by wearing Jordan’s old sneakers, they titled it Like Mike.

Lil Penny

Jordan made plenty of sneaker commercials in the 1990s, but his best-known ones are probably the early Air Jordans, which were ’80s ads. The ’90s sneaker commercials that I always think of are the ones where Penny Hardaway traded quips with a miniature “Lil Penny” puppet — voiced by comedian Chris Rock. The commercials ran all through the mid-’90s and got a lot of airplay, but this one sticks out in my mind because of Rock’s final line — “Tell ’em Lil Penny from the science club says hello!” — which, for some reason, my friends and I used to quote in school ad naseum.

Bagel Bites

If you take one thing away from this list, it should be this: Commercial jingles in the 1990s were absolute ear worms. And here is another one, for frozen Bagel Bites. “Pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening, pizza at suppertime. When pizza’s on a bagel, you can eat pizza anytime!” The melody is so catchy I don’t think I ever considered the lyrics’ meaning. Just because you put it on a bagel, you can eat pizza any time? How does that work? Only a madman (or maybe someone desperately trying to relive their childhood) would eat pizza bagels three times a day.

PopCrush logo

Once-Beloved Fast Food Items That No Longer Exist

These defunct fast food items have gone down in history. Wouldn’t you love to eat them again?

Read Entire Article