It can be hard to maintain friendships while growing older. For baby boomers and members of Generation X, however, it can be a critical matter of wellness.
Results from the University of Michigan National Poll on Healthy Aging has revealed that older adults without close friends are significantly more likely to experience poor mental and physical health compared to those with solid social connections. Newsweek spoke to therapist and head of relationships at Paired, Aly Bullock, about why the issue is pressing for these generations, who may face shrinking social circles due to health challenges, retirement, or changes in family dynamics.
The poll, published this month, suggests that loneliness isn't just an emotional problem—it's also a health risk. About 24 percent of older adults surveyed feel they don't have enough close friends, and this number is significantly higher among those with poorer health. Nearly half of those who rated their mental health as fair or poor said they lacked close friends, while 34 percent of those with fair or poor physical health reported the same.
Bullock, who specializes in working with older adults experiencing depression and anxiety, told Newsweek that the relationship between health and social connections is complex—and maybe even cyclical.
"Which comes first? Is it harder to make friends because of poor physical or mental health, or does a lack of friendships lead to poorer health outcomes?" she said. "Both are likely true. We know it can be challenging to know how to support and connect with someone who is struggling with their health, and we also know that loneliness contributes to declining physical and mental well-being."
From both poll results and her practice, though, Bullock is resolute that friendships are essential for emotional well-being.
"Humans are wired for connection; we were never meant to live in isolation," she said. "Through interactions with others, we find meaning in the world around us...Friendship becomes even more critical later in life because it combats the sense that the world is moving on without us. If I have a friend, we might feel irrelevant together, but we are together."
Particularly as older adults face health challenges or the loss of loved ones, friends can also offer more practical support, like assistance with medical appointments or advocating for one's health needs.
What to do if you're feeling isolated as an older person
As boomers and gen xers navigate the aging process, Bullock encouraged those who may feel socially isolated to take action.
"There's a common fallacy: 'If they aren't reaching out to me, it's not worth reaching out to them,'" she said. "This simply isn't true...There could be countless reasons someone isn't reaching out to you, and by making the first move, you might be the angel they needed in their life."
Bullock has seen the effects of this initiative in action. She said she works with a client in her 80s who uses Zoom to attend a monthly book club with friends.
"Not only does this give her something to do in her spare time, but it also gives her something to look forward to sharing with people who entertain her and share her interests," she said.
As the poll results give a nudge to aging adults to keep loved ones close, Bullock shared suggestions for larger-scale initiatives, too.
"We need increased resources that promote connection and well-being," she said, suggesting mental health support groups tailored for older adults, community-based exercise classes and technological education for seniors.
Among the many ways communities are addressing loneliness, Bullock advised middle-aged and senior people to keep one thing in mind: It's never too late.
"Look to the past. Is there someone you haven't spoken to in 40 years? Your lives took different paths, but now you find yourselves in a similar place," Bullock said. "Reconnect, reminisce, and see where the conversation takes you."
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English (US) ·